Published in the December 22, 2016 edition.
Well, it’s that time of year again.
The holiday season is upon us and that means it’s once again time to review my annual Christmas list. My list includes gifts for both naughty and nice, because who am I to judge?
Without further ado …
To Selectman Peter May: automatic canine voter registration.
To Fred Rich LaRiccia: a winner.
To Jen Migliore: new management.
To the Americal Civic Center: gun control.
To School Superintendent Dr. Kim Smith: a phone call.
To Designer Lawn Sprinkler Service: Will Ferrell.
To the Albion Cultural Exchange Committee: berets and goatees.
To the West Side: d-Con
To Lake Quannapowitt Committee Chairman Mike Collins: the Nobel Peace Prize.
To the Unitarian Universalists: a Merry Solstice and a Happy Equinox.
To the Human Rights Commission: a white Christmas.
To Nate Gayman: peace, love and understanding.
To Paul DiNocco: a chair.
To Dan Benjamin: his picture in the paper.
To Wendy Dennis: an inflammatory non sequitur.
To the Wakefield Civic League: a bright view.
To Pat Bruno: decaf.
To the Wakefield Police Department: A spray bottle of Roundup in every cruiser.
To the School Department: copies of Dr. Seuss’ “How the Grinch Stole Winter Break” and Charles Dickens’ “A Winter Carol.”
To Town Clerk Betsy Sheeran: a copy of the “2016 Town of Wakefield Annual Street List.”
To Rose Morgan: a Z and X a Q and a J.
No need to thank me. The joy is in the giving.
Merry Christmas!
